How do we start Meditating on Solutions for Loneliness? Let’s use the example of Sonia and Sunny, two characters in Kiran Desai’s book.
We look into possible causes for the Loneliness of Sonia and Sunny. Psychology and sociology have explanations for these characters in Kiran Desai’s book, which is shortlisted in the running for 2025 Booker Prize.
Sonia Shah and Sunny Bhatia could be affected by their respective broken families. Sonia lived with her mom after her parents broke up. She lacks her father figure. Being the daughter of her immigrant mom, she has low social capital; meaning little social resources to help her. She is disconnected (and lonely) from her culture and society.
Sunny has only his mom, after his dad died. His background is similar to Sonia’s he has low social capital too. Their small and dysfunctional family units could have contributed to their feelings of loneliness.
Do any of these factors resonate with you? Does any of these causes ring a bell in your head? I agree with them. Inflation puts pressure on a family and the parents decide to have only one child, or maybe two kids. If the offspring are of different gender, they may find some difficulties connecting and bonding. I can understand how the sister and brother can end up feeling lonely, although the parents have expected them to keep each other company.
We would guess that when two children belong to same gender, they would bond. But we can’t leave it to nature to gift the mother two kids of the same gender. The smart reader would suggest having three children as one of the solutions to the issue of the gender divide. Maybe. Its either getting
boy, girl, boy,
boy, boy, boy,
girl, girl, girl,
girl, girl, boy
But when the parents have two of the same gender, there is no necessity to have the third child, because what if the third is from the other gender? Then the third child is the odd one out of possibility of same gender bonding.
How do the rest of us handle the long hours of traveling in a train? We read, sleep, watch something on our smart device, listen to music, or talk to strangers. This is what Sonia and Sunny did, although they weren’t exactly strangers. Many years ago, their grandparents tried to matchmake them, while being ignorant that they were already attached in dysfunctional relationships. Then, on that fateful day, they physically crossed paths. They bonded while traveling on a train. The confined space of a train carriage reduced distraction and they could connect with communication.
Two lonely people like Sonia and Sunny meet at a space that allows for meaningful connections. With social skills gleaned from previous failed relationships, they really talk to connect.
One takeaway lesson is – the train is a space for meaningful connection; or the train can be that kind of space.
Here are some solutions to help handle the problem of loneliness:
Theoretically, opposites are able to attract not because they originate from diverse backgrounds, but because they possess social skills, and meet in spaces conducive for befriending and bonding.
If a person is affected by loneliness, they will think about it. Their unconsciousness may invent dreams about loneliness .
Related posts –
Loneliness isn’t the bane of personal and domestic discord. In fact, the opposite of loneliness, gatherings, may also contribute to problems like quarrels and ensuing violence. Holidays are periods when families gather to celebrate.
However, in some cultures, some unfairness in patriarchal households result in females shouldering much of the burden for food preparation. As people spend more time together in the enclosed confines of a home, the tendency for friction increases. Consequently, there is some stress and tension, which may erupt into violence if conditions escalate. Handlers of emergency call services report that it is usual for calls to increase during festive holidays.
Some people say that loneliness is a symptom of a real problem, which is boredom, or lack of activity. You have to plan your calendar and schedule your activities.
If you had been accompanied by family, or friends, you’ll feel lonely when you’re left alone. Other times, when you’re sick and need to be isolated, you might feel lonely with the sudden change of circumstances. However, this period is only temporary, as after you recuperate, you can join your family and companions again.
To be continued.